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Message: <blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 1063413403" data-attributes="member: 14320">I turn on my computer and I'm looking for some action.I see my online lover and beg for satisfaction.We go to a private room and you know what happens next.We think and type and talk about different kinds of sex.Just about 9 days pass and I find I'm feeling ill.Maalox, Pepto NOTHING will make my stomach chill.I mention it to my online love & we try to figure it out.A few more days have passed & my stomach's sticking out!So, now my head is spinning I don't know what to do.I'm having sex with no one, EXCEPT...my online boo.No, wait just a minute. Please tell me this can't be!He cannot get me pregnant by having cyber sex with me!I call the local clinic and explain the situation.All the nurses laugh at me, I'm crying in frustration.My stomach's getting bigger with every passing day.Who would have thought you could get pregnant this way?A pregnancy test was taken, it came back with a yes.I Instant messaged my online lover and put him to the test.I told him of my feelings and all my gaining weight.I told him we were parents and gave him my due date.When all the shock was over, he gave me an online *kiss*.He told me that he loved me & he'd help me get through this.My stomach starts to ache I go run to my mom.I feel the need and start to push & out pops a CD ROM!!I put it in the computer and while I wait, I pace.When soon on my computer, comes a beautiful baby's face!You know this story's fiction but before you take a risk,put on a cyber condom...before you get some cyber dick!It seemed soooo real *****Having a man in your life is like a deck of cards ...You need a heart to love themYou need a diamond to marry themYou need a club to beat themAnd you need a spade to bury the bastards Dog FoodA middle aged woman stopped at the local grocery store each day formonths, she always bought just one large can of dog food. One day thegrocery clerk ask the woman what kind of dog she had? she replied, Idon't have a dog, my husband eats this for his lunch each day and helikes it. The clerk said, madam this is not fit for human consumption,it could make him sick, maybe even kill him. The woman purchased thedog food and left.This continued daily for months, then she stopped coming intothe store. Several week later she stopped in and bought a loaf ofbread, the clerk ask if she wanted any dog food, she replied,no, my husband passed away several weeks ago. The clerk said I tried towarn you, that dog food could kill your husband. The woman said, OH,the dog food had nothing to do with it, he was crossing the road andstopped to lick his ass, and was hit by a car.o0o0o0o0o0Q: What do you call a lesbian Eskimo?A: A klondyke, o0o0o0o0o0Blonde Moments!The blonde teen-age girl had long been infatuated with a popular localdisc jockey and finally got to meet him when the station held an openhouse. When she seductively suggested they get better acquainted, hetook her into a vacant studio and unzipped his pants. "I suppose you know whatthis is?" he whispered."I sure do," she said, grasping it in her hand and putting it near hermouth, "I'd like to say hello to Ricky,Bobby, Tina and the whole gangdown at Danny's Pizzeria."</blockquote>

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