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Message: <blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 1063345936" data-attributes="member: 14320">A Pig FarmerA pig farmer in Alabama was trying to get his pigs to breed,with no success. Every morning, he'd run outside to the barn andperform a pregnancy test on the female pigs. Everyday, the results werenegative.The farmer was baffled.One day, he called the local vet and asked for some advice. Thefarmer explained that he couldn't get his pigs to mate. The vetreplied, "Try artificial insemination.""What's that?" the farmer asked.The veterinarian said, "It just means if you can't get your pigsto mate, you'll have to do it for them."So the next day the farmer rounded his pigs into the back of hispickup and headed into the woods. Soon he stopped, and one by one heshagged each of the pigs.Later that week, the farmer checked the pigs. None of them werepregnant! So the farmer took the pigs out again and shagged themreally good.After days of this, with no pregnant pigs, the farmer gave up.One morning as he went to feed the pigs, he arrived to find that thepigs were all missing! He ran back inside the house and shouted,"Wife! The pigs are gone!"His wife replied, "Honey you're not going to believe this, but all ofyour pigs are sitting in your pickup, and one of them is honkingthe horn."o0o0o0o0o0A farmer walked into a drug store and said to the pharmacist, "I wantme one of them thar condoms with pesticides on it. Where do Ifind'em?"The pharmacist replied, "Oh sir, you must mean that you want thecondoms with SPERMICIDE, not pesticide. They're on aisle 4.""No, no, I want me them thar condoms with PESTICIDE on it," growled thefarmer."Sir," said the pharmacist, exasperated from explaining, "PESTICIDE isfor killing insects, SPERMICIDE is for killing sperm. I'm sure that youmean spermicide instead of pesticide.""Listen here," argued the farmer, "I want condoms with PESTICIDE on it,my wife's got a bug up her ass, and I aim to kill it."---------- Post added at 05:53 PM ---------- 6 hour anti-bump limit - Previous post was at 12:02 PM ----------I Won, I Won....Louie walks into work one Monday morning with a hugegrin on his face. One of his co-workers says, "Whyare you so happy?" Louie says, "I played Bingo forthe first time in my life this weekend and I won athousand bucks!"A week later, Louie walks into work on Monday morningand he's skipping down the hall, high-fivingeveryone. One of his co-workers says, "You win atBingo again?" Louie says, "No, no, it's better thanthat. I bought my first lottery ticket this weekendand I won five grand. I'm feeling so damn lucky thatI think I'm going to ask that new Hindu girl inaccounting out on a date!"The next Monday morning, Louie is doing cartwheelsdown the hall.One of his co-workers says, "Did you win anotherlottery?" Louie says, "No, no, it's better than that.You know that Hindu girl in accounting I asked out?Well, we had a great time at dinner, so I invited herup to my apartment for drinks, we wind up in bed, andthe next thing I know she's giving me the best blowjob I ever had!"The co-worker says, "Man, are you frigging lucky!"Louie says, "No, no, it's better than that. She'sblowing me, I look down, and you know that red dot onher forehead? I scratched it . . ......and I won another ten grand!"@@@Q. What did the blonde’s left leg say to her right leg?A. Between the two of us, we can make a lot of money.Q. What's a blondes favorite nursery rhyme?A. Humpme DumpmeQ. Why did the blonde like the car with a sunroof?A. More leg-room!Q. Why do blondes like tilt steering?A. More headroomQ. Why don't blondes use vibrators?A. They chip their teeth.Q. What do you call a dumb blonde behind a steering wheel?A. An airbag.</blockquote>

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View attachment 636041

View attachment 636042

edited: video add on
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