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<blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 1063802447" data-attributes="member: 14320"><p><strong><span style="color: Teal"> Railroad Tracks</span></strong></p><p></p><p>An ugly man walks into his local pub with a big grin on his face.</p><p>"What are you so happy about?" asks the barman.</p><p>"Well I'll tell you," replies the ugly bloke, "you know I</p><p>live by the</p><p>railway. Well, on my way home last night I noticed</p><p>a young woman tied</p><p>to the tracks, like in the movies. Of course,</p><p>I went and cut her free and</p><p>took her back to my place. Anyway, to make a</p><p>long story short, I scored</p><p>big time. We made love all night, all over the house.</p><p>We did everything,</p><p>sometimes me on top, sometimes her on top."</p><p>"Fantastic," exclaimed the barman. "You lucky sod.</p><p>Was she pretty?"</p><p>"I don't know, I never found her head."</p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: Red">JKL</span></strong></p><p></p><p>Q. What did the lesbian bumper sticker say?</p><p>A. "Save a tree. Eat a beaver."</p><p></p><p>Q. What do you call 2 lesbians in a canoe?</p><p>A. Fur Traders</p><p></p><p>Q. What's a queers favorite dish in a Chinese restaurant?</p><p>A. Cream of Sum Yung Guy.</p><p></p><p>Q. Did you hear about the queer termite?</p><p>A. He went for the woodpecker.</p><p></p><p>Q. Two gays and two lesbians are all fleeing the country.</p><p>Which pair is going to make it out first?</p><p>A. The two gays... they already have their shit packed.</p><p></p><p>Q. What's the definition of "hell on earth?"</p><p>A. A blind lesbian in a fish store.</p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: Red">JKL</span></strong></p><p><strong></strong></p><p><strong><span style="color: Teal">THE REAL MEANING OF ABC</span></strong></p><p></p><p>A IS FOR ASS UPON WHICH YOU SIT, THE HOLE IN THE</p><p>BOTTOM THROUGH WHICH YOU SHIT.</p><p></p><p>B IS FOR BALLS EACH MAN HAS A PAIR A WRINKED</p><p>OLD BAG ALL COVERED WITH HAIR.</p><p></p><p>C IS FOR CUNT ALL JUICEY AND THICK, IT IS HOME</p><p>SWEET HOME TO A SEVEN INCH PRICK.</p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: Red">JKL</span></strong></p><p></p><p>A young woman was having a physical examination and was very embarrassed because of a weight problem. As she removed her last bit of clothing, she blushed. "I'm so ashamed, and dirty Doctor," she said, "I guess I let myself go." The physician was checking hers eyes and ears. "Don't feel ashamed, Miss. You don't look that bad."</p><p></p><p>"Do you really think so, Doctor?" she asked. The doctor held a tongue depressor in front of her face and said, "Of course. Now just open your mouth and say moo."</p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: Red">JKL</span></strong></p><p></p><p>A man says to his wife, "I fancy kinky sex, how about I blow my</p><p>load in your ear?" The wife hastily replies, "No, I might go deaf!"</p><p>To which the man replies, "I've been shooting my love wads in</p><p>your mouth for the last 20 years and you're still fucking talking aren't you?"</p><p><strong><span style="color: Teal"></span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="color: Teal">Bulls And Cows</span></strong></p><p></p><p>An old farmer is having trouble getting his bull to breed with the cows</p><p>and was lamenting the fact to a few of his friends down at the local</p><p>beer hall.</p><p></p><p>One of them said, "Ya know, Ben, I used to have the same trouble with my</p><p>bull, but I got it fixed really quick."</p><p></p><p>"How did you get it fixed?" asked Ben.</p><p></p><p>"Well I just dipped my finger in the cow's vagina and rubbed it all over</p><p>the bull's nose and he got right after her."</p><p></p><p>Ben went home to the farm and decided to try it. He grabbed a cow,</p><p>dipped his fingers in the cow's vagina and rubbed it all around the</p><p>bull's nose.</p><p></p><p>The bull got a rip roaring boner and immediately jumped on the cow.</p><p></p><p>Ben was impressed. That night, he got into bed with his wife and can't</p><p>get the effect on the bull out of his mind. As she lay sleeping, Ben</p><p>dips his fingers into his wife's vagina and feeling that it was nice and</p><p>wet, rubbed it all around his nose and got a rip roaring hard on.</p><p></p><p>He quickly shook his wife awake and cried out, "Honey, look!"</p><p></p><p>She rolled over, turned on the light and said, "You mean you woke me up</p><p>in the middle of the night just to show me that you have a nosebleed?"</p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: Red">{{{{{</span></strong></p><p></p><p></p><p>There Once was a man From Nantucket</p><p></p><p>Whose c*ck was so long he could suck it</p><p></p><p>He said with a grin</p><p></p><p>While wiping his chin</p><p></p><p>If my ear were a c*nt I would f*ck it</p><p></p><p></p><p>There once was a man from Kansas,</p><p></p><p>Who's nuts were made out of brass</p><p></p><p>In stormy weather,</p><p></p><p>he'd clack them together</p><p></p><p>and lightning shot out of his ass</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="melody, post: 1063802447, member: 14320"] [B][COLOR="Teal"] Railroad Tracks[/COLOR][/B] An ugly man walks into his local pub with a big grin on his face. "What are you so happy about?" asks the barman. "Well I'll tell you," replies the ugly bloke, "you know I live by the railway. Well, on my way home last night I noticed a young woman tied to the tracks, like in the movies. Of course, I went and cut her free and took her back to my place. Anyway, to make a long story short, I scored big time. We made love all night, all over the house. We did everything, sometimes me on top, sometimes her on top." "Fantastic," exclaimed the barman. "You lucky sod. Was she pretty?" "I don't know, I never found her head." [B][COLOR="Red"]JKL[/COLOR][/B] Q. What did the lesbian bumper sticker say? A. "Save a tree. Eat a beaver." Q. What do you call 2 lesbians in a canoe? A. Fur Traders Q. What's a queers favorite dish in a Chinese restaurant? A. Cream of Sum Yung Guy. Q. Did you hear about the queer termite? A. He went for the woodpecker. Q. Two gays and two lesbians are all fleeing the country. Which pair is going to make it out first? A. The two gays... they already have their shit packed. Q. What's the definition of "hell on earth?" A. A blind lesbian in a fish store. [B][COLOR="Red"]JKL[/COLOR] [COLOR="Teal"]THE REAL MEANING OF ABC[/COLOR][/B] A IS FOR ASS UPON WHICH YOU SIT, THE HOLE IN THE BOTTOM THROUGH WHICH YOU SHIT. B IS FOR BALLS EACH MAN HAS A PAIR A WRINKED OLD BAG ALL COVERED WITH HAIR. C IS FOR CUNT ALL JUICEY AND THICK, IT IS HOME SWEET HOME TO A SEVEN INCH PRICK. [B][COLOR="Red"]JKL[/COLOR][/B] A young woman was having a physical examination and was very embarrassed because of a weight problem. As she removed her last bit of clothing, she blushed. "I'm so ashamed, and dirty Doctor," she said, "I guess I let myself go." The physician was checking hers eyes and ears. "Don't feel ashamed, Miss. You don't look that bad." "Do you really think so, Doctor?" she asked. The doctor held a tongue depressor in front of her face and said, "Of course. Now just open your mouth and say moo." [B][COLOR="Red"]JKL[/COLOR][/B] A man says to his wife, "I fancy kinky sex, how about I blow my load in your ear?" The wife hastily replies, "No, I might go deaf!" To which the man replies, "I've been shooting my love wads in your mouth for the last 20 years and you're still fucking talking aren't you?" [B][COLOR="Teal"] Bulls And Cows[/COLOR][/B] An old farmer is having trouble getting his bull to breed with the cows and was lamenting the fact to a few of his friends down at the local beer hall. One of them said, "Ya know, Ben, I used to have the same trouble with my bull, but I got it fixed really quick." "How did you get it fixed?" asked Ben. "Well I just dipped my finger in the cow's vagina and rubbed it all over the bull's nose and he got right after her." Ben went home to the farm and decided to try it. He grabbed a cow, dipped his fingers in the cow's vagina and rubbed it all around the bull's nose. The bull got a rip roaring boner and immediately jumped on the cow. Ben was impressed. That night, he got into bed with his wife and can't get the effect on the bull out of his mind. As she lay sleeping, Ben dips his fingers into his wife's vagina and feeling that it was nice and wet, rubbed it all around his nose and got a rip roaring hard on. He quickly shook his wife awake and cried out, "Honey, look!" She rolled over, turned on the light and said, "You mean you woke me up in the middle of the night just to show me that you have a nosebleed?" [B][COLOR="Red"]{{{{{[/COLOR][/B] There Once was a man From Nantucket Whose c*ck was so long he could suck it He said with a grin While wiping his chin If my ear were a c*nt I would f*ck it There once was a man from Kansas, Who's nuts were made out of brass In stormy weather, he'd clack them together and lightning shot out of his ass [/QUOTE]
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