Got These Stuff From Other Website
No Offence To Ah Beng-Ah Beng (or Ah Lian) In ZTH
As Below:-
1. In ancient China, there was this famous martial artist, General
Beng. He rode a fiery chariot with lots of bright colorful lights, and
his chariot made loud powerful sounds. You can say that General Beng was
a one-man light and sound show, rivaling the best fireworks show.
General Beng fought many wars and battles and always won them by scaring
the living daylights out of his enemies with his bright lights and loud
sounds. In his most famous battle, as his forces were almost defeated,
General Beng rode his famous chariot with into battle bright and loud.
So distracted were his enemies that they lost the battle. So in his
honor, drivers of cars with bright lights and loud banging sounds are
named Ah Beng. Soon, he will be in the pages of Chinese mythology with
divine status equaling General Kuan.
2. There was a guy who liked to have bright lights and noisy muffler
installed on his tiny underpowered local car. This unknown guy, Mr.
Anonymous, was one of the first customizer of underpowered, but noisy
cars. One day while driving along slowly but brightly noisily, another
guy came up fast in a powerful imported car. The driver of the import
got distracted by the bright lights and sounds and rear-ended poor Mr.
Anonymous's car. There was a loud Bang that proved the accident. Both
Mr. Anonymous and the driver got out to discuss the accident. The driver
of the import said, “Sorry for the accident, mate. You car made a
banging sound and that distracted me. What is your name so I can pay you
for the damages?" Mr. Anonymous was not a fluent English speaker and he
replied, "My car kena bang ah." The driver of the import thought, Mr.
Anonymous's name was Ah Beng and so the name stuck for the driver of any
car that was a running light and sound show.
Ah Beng's Idol
Unconfirmed General Beng sighting.
Ah Bengers from around the KL area gathered to pay homage to their patron
deity, the Great General Beng. They came in droves with their modified
Kancils, Kanlaris, and Kelissas, bright and multicolored, loud with
modified mufflers and super ICE. There were even some ancient Sagas,
truly wondrous tales from a long bygone era. They met in an undisclosed
and remote location in South KL. As part of their Chinese New Year
celebration, they got some illegal party noise makers (some bystanders
allege that fireworks were fired, while others claim that it was car
backfire) and put on a spectacular veritable noise and light show.
Underpowered engines a roaring, petrol fumes a clouding, car lights a
blazing, spinning wheels a turning, black tires a streaking, cigar power
a smoking, bright VTEC decals a glowing, and super woofers a banging; it
was a show for the HEAVENS. Not to be outdone, the stunt drivers began
to show off their prowess with their modified modern day chariots of
light and fire. They raced from 0 to 100 in 25 seconds flat with puny
660 auto engines shuddering, climbing steep 1% gradient inclines in
record speeds of 25kph -- hey give the poor mouse deer a break. They
drifted (well sort of) around the track leaving rubber skid marks and
bits and pieces of modified parts on the asphalt. Their dedication to
the patron deity, General Beng, showed no bounds and limits. Of course,
there were a few on watch with bulgy red packets, just in case the
traffic police decided to pay a visit.
Suddenly, from the Eastern sky, a bright chariot of gold and amber was
spotted. This chariot was an incredible sight, Technicolor fantasy,
moving faster than the fastest Kanlari, 0 to 100 in under 20s, and drawn
by 30 horses or 30bhp. The Ah Bengers, with gorgeous dates clinging to
their arms, oohed and aahed their surprise to see the sight most
amazing. The chariot had glow in the dark decals, spinning wheel lights,
pulsing LED lights, and other special lighting only found in the most
exclusive of the bestest of the best Ah Beng accessory shops. The sonic
boom defeated all imagination (and incidentally, also shattered the glass
of a few Sagas). The last time this sight was seen was during the later
three kingdom era of ancient China in the year 277 AD. A few Ah Beng
historians remembered reading about the final victory General Beng had
over his enemies exactly 1728 years ago on the first day of the Lunar New
Year (numerologist note, 1728 = 12 cubed), and during the year of the big
fat yellow chicken. And as suddenly as the chariot appeared, it took off
across the invisible new moon, like a Santa sledge drawn by multitudes of
reindeers.
The awe and shocked Ah Bengers were beside themselves with joy. Ah Beng
historians recorded this most significant event and anticipate the next
visit of General Beng in the year 3733, also the year of the big fat
yellow chicken.
And so, this latest sighting of the Great General Beng occurred on the
first day of the Lunar New Year in the year of the big fat yellow
chicken. Ah Bengers all over will be customizing their cars even more
this year in honor of their patron deity, the Great General Beng. Soon,
General Beng will earn deity status equal to the other great general,
General Kuan (Kuan Kung).
Ah Lian???
As humans evolved from hunter gatherers to tv watching/computer
playing/car driving lifeforms, the need for physical prowness has
declined. Rather, evolutionary pressures are toward cerebral and
artificial adaptations. Just like peahens that go after the peacocks
with the biggest plumage, Ah Lians gravitate toward Ah Bengs with the
brightest and most colorful lights. No longer do the females look for
physical strength, but rather, look for adaptation in artificial
lifestyles. The bright lights signal to the Ah Lians that the Ah Bengs
in question are higher lifeforms who have evolved further along the
phylogenic scale.
These Ah Bengs have further developed their Machiavelian charade by
pretending to be a lower lifeform when they are actually more evolved.
They are the beginning of a new species -- Homo Ahbengus Superiorititus.
One More Thing
No Offence To Those Felt They Involved In the Above Article
I know some one does
Hehe
No Offence To Ah Beng-Ah Beng (or Ah Lian) In ZTH
As Below:-
1. In ancient China, there was this famous martial artist, General
Beng. He rode a fiery chariot with lots of bright colorful lights, and
his chariot made loud powerful sounds. You can say that General Beng was
a one-man light and sound show, rivaling the best fireworks show.
General Beng fought many wars and battles and always won them by scaring
the living daylights out of his enemies with his bright lights and loud
sounds. In his most famous battle, as his forces were almost defeated,
General Beng rode his famous chariot with into battle bright and loud.
So distracted were his enemies that they lost the battle. So in his
honor, drivers of cars with bright lights and loud banging sounds are
named Ah Beng. Soon, he will be in the pages of Chinese mythology with
divine status equaling General Kuan.
2. There was a guy who liked to have bright lights and noisy muffler
installed on his tiny underpowered local car. This unknown guy, Mr.
Anonymous, was one of the first customizer of underpowered, but noisy
cars. One day while driving along slowly but brightly noisily, another
guy came up fast in a powerful imported car. The driver of the import
got distracted by the bright lights and sounds and rear-ended poor Mr.
Anonymous's car. There was a loud Bang that proved the accident. Both
Mr. Anonymous and the driver got out to discuss the accident. The driver
of the import said, “Sorry for the accident, mate. You car made a
banging sound and that distracted me. What is your name so I can pay you
for the damages?" Mr. Anonymous was not a fluent English speaker and he
replied, "My car kena bang ah." The driver of the import thought, Mr.
Anonymous's name was Ah Beng and so the name stuck for the driver of any
car that was a running light and sound show.
Ah Beng's Idol
Unconfirmed General Beng sighting.
Ah Bengers from around the KL area gathered to pay homage to their patron
deity, the Great General Beng. They came in droves with their modified
Kancils, Kanlaris, and Kelissas, bright and multicolored, loud with
modified mufflers and super ICE. There were even some ancient Sagas,
truly wondrous tales from a long bygone era. They met in an undisclosed
and remote location in South KL. As part of their Chinese New Year
celebration, they got some illegal party noise makers (some bystanders
allege that fireworks were fired, while others claim that it was car
backfire) and put on a spectacular veritable noise and light show.
Underpowered engines a roaring, petrol fumes a clouding, car lights a
blazing, spinning wheels a turning, black tires a streaking, cigar power
a smoking, bright VTEC decals a glowing, and super woofers a banging; it
was a show for the HEAVENS. Not to be outdone, the stunt drivers began
to show off their prowess with their modified modern day chariots of
light and fire. They raced from 0 to 100 in 25 seconds flat with puny
660 auto engines shuddering, climbing steep 1% gradient inclines in
record speeds of 25kph -- hey give the poor mouse deer a break. They
drifted (well sort of) around the track leaving rubber skid marks and
bits and pieces of modified parts on the asphalt. Their dedication to
the patron deity, General Beng, showed no bounds and limits. Of course,
there were a few on watch with bulgy red packets, just in case the
traffic police decided to pay a visit.
Suddenly, from the Eastern sky, a bright chariot of gold and amber was
spotted. This chariot was an incredible sight, Technicolor fantasy,
moving faster than the fastest Kanlari, 0 to 100 in under 20s, and drawn
by 30 horses or 30bhp. The Ah Bengers, with gorgeous dates clinging to
their arms, oohed and aahed their surprise to see the sight most
amazing. The chariot had glow in the dark decals, spinning wheel lights,
pulsing LED lights, and other special lighting only found in the most
exclusive of the bestest of the best Ah Beng accessory shops. The sonic
boom defeated all imagination (and incidentally, also shattered the glass
of a few Sagas). The last time this sight was seen was during the later
three kingdom era of ancient China in the year 277 AD. A few Ah Beng
historians remembered reading about the final victory General Beng had
over his enemies exactly 1728 years ago on the first day of the Lunar New
Year (numerologist note, 1728 = 12 cubed), and during the year of the big
fat yellow chicken. And as suddenly as the chariot appeared, it took off
across the invisible new moon, like a Santa sledge drawn by multitudes of
reindeers.
The awe and shocked Ah Bengers were beside themselves with joy. Ah Beng
historians recorded this most significant event and anticipate the next
visit of General Beng in the year 3733, also the year of the big fat
yellow chicken.
And so, this latest sighting of the Great General Beng occurred on the
first day of the Lunar New Year in the year of the big fat yellow
chicken. Ah Bengers all over will be customizing their cars even more
this year in honor of their patron deity, the Great General Beng. Soon,
General Beng will earn deity status equal to the other great general,
General Kuan (Kuan Kung).
Ah Lian???
As humans evolved from hunter gatherers to tv watching/computer
playing/car driving lifeforms, the need for physical prowness has
declined. Rather, evolutionary pressures are toward cerebral and
artificial adaptations. Just like peahens that go after the peacocks
with the biggest plumage, Ah Lians gravitate toward Ah Bengs with the
brightest and most colorful lights. No longer do the females look for
physical strength, but rather, look for adaptation in artificial
lifestyles. The bright lights signal to the Ah Lians that the Ah Bengs
in question are higher lifeforms who have evolved further along the
phylogenic scale.
These Ah Bengs have further developed their Machiavelian charade by
pretending to be a lower lifeform when they are actually more evolved.
They are the beginning of a new species -- Homo Ahbengus Superiorititus.
One More Thing
No Offence To Those Felt They Involved In the Above Article
I know some one does
Hehe
